It Slices! It Dices!

And that’s not all! Pot-bellied pigs are a hassle to clean up after, and can take forever to devour human flesh! But with sulfuric acid, the body’s gone and the pigpen can be your slave dungeon once more! And it all comes free with your purchase!

McDiddler6.17.09 @ 11:37pm

first babies and now power saws…I like where this is going

moog6.17.09 @ 11:39pm

John Worely could sell condoms to a eunuch.

Brian Firenzi6.18.09 @ 1:23am

Condoms that have an incredibly convenient, easy-to-clean flipside that grates and peels vegetables of all sizes.

Uncle Remus6.18.09 @ 2:02am

The postmortem finger-twitch says, “noo-oooo…..”—but reassuring chords (in 3 / 4) say, “yea-hahhhhhh!”

PA6.18.09 @ 2:35am

And all this time i’ve been using those nasty saws… thanks, ChopWow!

Earthbreaker6.18.09 @ 3:51am

Looked like quite a clean kill…until he got the frickin saw out!

youre21 (22 actually)

thenation6.18.09 @ 4:21am

I bought condoms from John Worely.

pickle6.18.09 @ 7:20am

so would that flipside be like the cracker/pretzel combination thingy… and if so, would the grater be on the outside for extra friction or the inside for extra lube?

RealJonWorley6.18.09 @ 1:03pm

That Eunuch needs my new FINGER CONDOMS, not available in stores, or on TV.
Just need to text your sister’s age and eating habits to 1-800-555-2625, and I’ll send you one absolutely free.

Shmoe6.18.09 @ 1:34pm

Is there anything Jon Worely can’t do?

Lore6.18.09 @ 1:39pm

That controlled yet subtle hand gesture toward the hooker was reminiscent of some of the great pitchmen in television history.

7ru7h6.18.09 @ 8:27pm

nice vid, congrats btw on appearing on Tosh.0 today…they may not have shown the best two vids, but its good to see you guys getting more exposure

XxXchaseXxX6.18.09 @ 8:30pm

hahah this is fucking funny

qzz6.19.09 @ 7:04am

no more saws for me

Griffin6.21.09 @ 11:23am

I love how the “dead hooker’s” fingers are moving

antolicus6.23.09 @ 3:29pm

the hooker moves

RealJonWorley6.23.09 @ 4:26pm

That’s the point! She still has some death rattles in her. Makes it more disturbing when I chop her up.

Mitchrapp6.30.09 @ 9:35pm

reminds me of DEXTER every time I watch this clip
love the slight blood splatter at the end.

El Liamo7.03.09 @ 6:52am

God bless ye, John Worley.

Oh! By the by, I’ll half a dozen ChopWows, if’n ya please!

El Liamo7.03.09 @ 6:58am

Oh, yeah, Worley! I got a great new idea for one of these. It basically shows you in a snowy area with some guy next too you. “John Worley here, and I’m stuck on a mountain! How can I eat my best friend?” You then brandish a pair of chopsticks. “With the FleshPincher 2.0!” Your friend then says in a terrified voice, “Wait, what?” As you turn towards him, chopsticks at the ready.

Whaddya think?

slice'emdiceem8.06.09 @ 7:36pm

Dead Hooker? Oh no!

Uninvited guest to 4 year old's birthday party8.28.09 @ 9:17pm

If I had a nickle…

[zipper61]

The Leetnes10.10.09 @ 10:19pm

There’s an important lesson to be learned from this video and that is that hookers are people and not meant to be strangled.

321610012.07.09 @ 8:39pm

Killed a hooker?! No, her hand was still twitching.

R.A.I.U.12.09.09 @ 8:55pm

?
I see no living thing there ‘cept Jon